By January 1994, the waiting and uncertainty of domestic infant adoption was taking
it's toll on our family. We were tiring of the ordeal and it was difficult to answer our 5
years old son's questions about a possible brother or sister. It was time to take a stand.
Our decision, adopt in 1994, or lay the issue to rest. This resolution required a new
strategy. Gradually we decided inter country adoption was the best option for our family.
Also, our son was now in school, so an older, preschool child would fit our family well.
Research led us to Russia since these adoptions moved along quite quickly. Careful
consideration of agencies led us to Cradle of Hope. We selected CHAC because the staff was
well informed, easy to deal with and returned our calls in a timely fashion. In addition,
families who had used CHAC said they would do it all again.
These
decisions made, we approached gathering the necessary paperwork methodically. Although
there were no major problems, at the time the paperwork process seemed overwhelming. The
step-by-step instructions from CHAC were most helpful. Relieved, we sent our completed
paperwork to CHAC and very quickly received our first referral. Deciding not to accept
that child for medical reasons was extremely difficult, but we knew it was the right
decision. CHAC was supportive. Almost immediately the CHAC Waiting Child flyer arrived.
There we found our son.
"Sasha" was born with a cleft lip and palate, had speech delays and would
need more surgery. At nearly 4 years of age, he would fit into our family well and have
time at home before starting school. We consulted various professionals familiar with
clefts and said "YES" to this little boy. Now the adoption was becoming real and
exciting. Our son, Craig, then in first grade, selected his brother's middle name, took
the picture to school, helped put up the bed, and anxiously waited to hear when his little
brother would be coming home.
As we waited, more questions formed in our minds, many of which were not easily
answered. We were committed to this little boy and were anxious to meet him. I would
wonder what "Sasha" was doing and if he knew we were preparing to bring him
home. Craig, now 6 and in first grade would stay at home with his grandparents when we
traveled, and CHAC would keep them informed of our progress in Russia.
The trip was both exciting and nerve wracking. Everything went well. There was time to
sight see and shop. Then came the day we waited so long for - we met our son, Alex. With
his big, brown eyes and even bigger smile we recognized him immediately. CHAC had prepared
us well for the trip as we had talked to only a few people who had previously gone to
Russia. Lack of control over the adoption procedure was more difficult than strange food,
foreign language and more primitive conditions. Our host family and coordinator were
great. They made us feel welcome and were helpful with our son. We arrived home in
November with our new son having met our adoption deadline with one month to spare.
Alex was tiny, closer in size to 2 1/2 than his actual 4 years. Craig seemed to have
grown 2 feet in the 10 days we were gone. Quickly we all settled into the adjustment
phase. Initially, Alex got into Craig's things and was less of a playmate than expected.
As parents we needed to enforce certain rules, keep a schedule and form attachments. With
Craig in school all day we had time to devote to Alex alone. Although very self sufficient
from orphanage life, he quickly began to let us take care of him. We could wash, dress,
carry and even feed him initially.
Today, Alex is 6 and Craig almost 9. They argue and play like true brothers. Alex has
had mouth surgery with more to come. His speech is progressing with therapy. He also
receives OT for fine motor skills and sensory integration difficulties right at school. He
loves tacos, but still prefers his milk warm, Russian style. He can ride his two-wheeled
bike, roller blade and enjoys music, legos and books. He is excited about learning to read
in first grade. His family is very important to him.
As a family we are active in our local FRUA group for support and friendship. Both boys
now have friends adopted from Russia as well as American born friends. We often wonder
about the specifics of his first 4 years at the baby home. Initially Alex told a few
stories, but these memories are fading. It seems as if Alex has always been part of our
family. We have 2 very special boys and wouldn't change a thing. CHAC will always have a
special place in our hearts for helping us bring home our son.
Why Choose Cradle | Int'l
Adoption Process | Adoption
Programs | Survey Findings
| Cradle Families
Getting Started | Photo
Listings | Bridge of Hope | Upcoming
Events | Special Projects
| Contact Us